Comedy Injury

I’ve got a broken arse bone.

On the 27th of June I wrote about dropping a telly on my knee (long story, read the entry) I briefly mentioned landing on my bum too. Well, as it turns out my knee if fine, but I broke my bum.
I was kinda OK all last, it was sore, but I coped. Then on Friday I went out with Edna for a few beers and to watch the football and promptly spent the whole night perched on wooden stools. Saturday I woke up to pain. More pain than had been experience since the great rollerskating incident of ’98 (another story for another day).

Today, I went to the doctor. She asked me what I’d done, I explained. She asked when does it hurt, I explained when I walk, sit, stand, laugh, all the time really. Then she did one last test. She asked me to stand with my back to her, she placed her left hand on my tummy then gentle pushed with her right fingers flat on the top of my bum. After she peeled me off the ceiling she wrote a referral for the X-Ray place.

The radiologist didn’t like what he saw and told me it wasn’t good, but because he not a doctor he wasn’t allowed to tell me it was broken. The Doctor does that ‘officially’ tomorrow.

There is nothing they can do for this type of break, just rest and take it easy while it heals. When I look back over my injury record, all my breaks have been the same;Aged 13 – broke my left little toe on a door frame, treatment none.Aged 20 – broke my index and middle finger on right hand, treatment strapping and lolly stick.Aged 30 – broke the bone on the side of my right foot, treatment none.Aged 331/2 – broken arse bone – treatment none

Not a cast or sympathy gathering crutches in sight, just a bruised and broken arse!

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