Nothing to see here...YET!

I went to the doctor today and my blood pressure is fine. So I rewarded myself by not going swimming and planning out the six weeks that hubbies parents are going to be here. They arrive on Monday 12th Feb in the evening, and trust me when I say the stress of that planning session used up several million more calories than half an hour of swimming ever would.

You may hear tales of woo over the next few weeks and my apoligies in advance. I'll try and make them funny :-)

(67 words)

iPod Mayhem

A combination of poor planning and forgetfulness meant that all my newly ironed work clothes got left in the bush last night when we drove back to the city. This meant, I had to beat the traffic (left office at four) out of the city so I didn’t spend my entire evening in the car.

I was given a gadget for Christmas that let me plug my iPod into the lighter thingy and play it through the car speakers. I know these things have been around a while, but I’m still impressed. I get to listen to the music I chose instead of rambling DJ’s who love their own voices, but have nothing to say (pot, kettle;-). I have chosen before to listen to Robbie all the way, ‘cause I Heart Robbie, of Madonna and sometime one of my playlist, such as Driving Songs (Hmmm…I wonder that could be?) or my romantic mix of songs that move me (include Cyndi Lauper’s Time After Time).

Anyway, today I though I would try shuffle.

Between us, my hubby and I have been collecting CD’s since the LP and tape died. We have very different taste and the only CD that we have two copies of is Jeff Wayne’s War of the Worlds (I don’t count Kylie’s Fever ‘cause I brought the second copy in a bargain bin for ten bucks by mistake), his hobby for nearly two tears was backing all the CD’s up onto the computer, so give or take a few I have 8565 songs on my iPod. I think it works out at over a months continuous playing with no repeats (at an average 3.5 minutes per song, please feel free to correct me if my math is wrong).

I have leant today in my three hours in the car (apart from the fact I have a music collection a stereo type gay man would be proud of) that there are some shuffle follow on that are down right hilarious or perfect, some a bit odd and some, just wrong on so many levels it doesn’t bear thinking about.

Please look at the following and rate on a scale of 1-5 (with 1 being hilarious/great)

1. Monty Python, the Cheese Sketch – John Lennon, Give Peace a Chance

2. Bette Midler, When a Man loves a Woman – Fatbot Slim, Praise you – Right Said Fred, I’m to Sexy

3. Judy Garland, Somewhere over the Rainbow - Meatloaf, Bat Out of Hell – Enya, Anywhere Is

4. David Bowie, Changes – The Doors, Break on Through – Elvis Presley, Suspicious Minds

5. ABBA, I have a Dream – Benjamin Britten, Young Persons Guide to the Orchestra from Peter and the Wolf - ZZ Top, La Grange

(461 words)

(In case you’re wondering 1, 5, 5, 2, 4)

BP and Work Stress

I started back at work today and as some of you may know (and some of you may not care) I have a problem with my blood pressure to the point where I take lots of drugs (legal) to keep it at a nice even 120/80ish.

I have been on holidays since 22nd December, those of you that keep track of my little journal will know I have had a mixture of fun, relaxation and a scare or two but nothing could prepare me for this morning.

I got up at 8.15am, dressed, walked the four blocks to the office with a brief stop at the City Edge café to pick up a large fruit salad ($5 and I got a plum) for brekkie. I was in the office with my PC logged on by 8.45pm. Something of a miracle considering I haven’t dragged my arse out of my pit before lunchtime for the last ten days. Anyway, that’s another story ;-)

So…PC logged on, Christmas and New Year tales shared with my co-workers and I was standing by the printer picking up my latest creation when I came over all dizzy. I had to grab the printer to stop myself from falling. I slowly made my way back to my desk and dug out my portable BP monitor.

110/58!

Holy crap! It was only 10 o’clock in the morning and I had done nothing! All I’d done is walk to the office, chit chat a bit and print out work I hadn’t even produced in the office. This place has amazing healing powers it’s so chilled out and laid back! Well, maybe a bit too good. In all the weeks I have had off my BP had sat nicely at 118 -125/70 – 85 nothing so low my head span!

I knew it would be good for me to get back to work.

(313 words)

Swimming 9

Ok...it's been far to long since my last swim so today I started again with 20 lenght of lady breast stroke in 18 minutes

Exciting Day

Once again Australia Day has come and gone. A day were city dwellers flee the confines of concrete and block the major traffic arteries out of the city for the whole of the day before and at the end of the long weekend.

Once again Hubby and I missed the ferry races on the Harbour, the vintage car line up in Hyde Park and Macquarie Street and the 21 gun salute from Mrs. Macquarie’s Chair.

Instead we stayed in the bush and watched movies we’ve seen before. I wrote a couple poems, well actually I edited one and wrote a new Tanka. I also finished a book I’ve been reading on and off. The Further Adventures of Belle de Jour, a very cool book about an ex-London call girl. Her first book is about when she was on the game. I also ordered a few new books from Amazon, a couple of fetish books and a book of poetry by Christian Bok. I shall look forward to receiving the wisdom they have to impart.

(176 words)

Coastal Shopping Hell

I have had the luxury of spending most of January at the house in the bush. Now I love the quiet, undisturbed peace that resides in the bush. The boys, Puss and Newk have enjoyed the holiday too, Newk has lost a little weight, Puss has lost a lot.

Today, I had to go to the local shopping centre for sustenance, a duvet cover and to post the Alpaca newsletter. The rain (first for weeks) had brought all the freaky locals out to play and the car park was completely full, so I had to park in the mail zone first, then on the concrete end of a row a spaces. Thank goodness for all wheel drive.

Tuggarah has been the shopping centre that I’ve used for over four years. I’ve always found it to be a bit dodgy but recently I have started to notice how completely rancid it is. The last time I was there I had lunch and had the pleasure of seeing a heavily pregnant woman wearing yellow having a smoke and the guy sitting behind me had arse cleavage that you could park a bike in.

Today I saw a rather large lady wearing not enough clothing to cover a rather small lady, a spry chickie parking in the disabled spaces and gaggles of old and aging smokers gathered around the doorways but out of the rain. I dashed into the fruit and veggie shop and was stunned by the lack of urgency. Not that I was in a hurry, but a ten minute queue to pay was frustrating. I rushed away so quickly I forgot to buy cat food.

I also popped to Spotlight to buy a duvet cover. I picked one quickly, a miracle in itself ‘cause normally you can’t find anything, the place always looks like a bombs hit it and a shower is nearly always required after a visit because it’s so dusty. Anyway, I needed a duvet cover and a varnish brush and they sell ‘em cheap. I picked what I wanted an got in the queue. Twenty minutes later, the two older ladies had paid for their purchases and I made the mistake of asking how much the paint brushes were.

The girl behind the counter looked at me blankly, then at the brushes, she picked one up and scanned the barcode, then in a flash to ‘Little Britain’ she said ‘computer says no’ Apparently the brushes I had picked were not registered in the computer and she had to go find the price. A few more minutes and a queue snaking its way through the store and she was back.

I had a desire to drive really fast afterwards, away from the people, away from the coast, but I didn’t I resisted as I realized that deep down I like the hustle and bustle of the city. I need the speeds which operate there. I’ve been bush for too long and starting back to work on the 29th will not be a minute too soon.

(509 words)

Tagged

While searching for something completely unrelated I found a blog for a guy called Jeff Pulver. And he writes that as a blog reader you think you know the person you are reading about. The idea is to tell five facts about yourself that hasn’t been told in the blog and then tag five people to do the same…so here goes

1. I used to eat toothpaste as a child
2. I’m dyslexic
3. My favorite book is 101 Dalmatians by Dodie Smith
4. I have an IQ of 134
5. The old couple on the bed in Titanic always makes me cry even if I haven’t seen the rest of the movie.

Tag – Edna, Miss Eudoxia, The Other Andrew, and anyone else who cares to try…make sure you tell us your blog name in comments.

White Van Woman

On Tuesday I had to take the girls (alpacas, Wispa and Arabella) from their current home on a little spa retreat / shag feast. So I borrowed the white van, loaded them up and drove a little over 300kilometers south to a place called Canyonleigh and their home for the next three months.

But I find myself a part of a unique family. That of the White Van Man. When you drive a white van you all sense of yourself behind the wheel. You have to rely on the wing mirrors and leave plenty of time to maneuver with lots of indication. The only problem is that other road users don’t get that. And I, as a car driver normally am one of those people.

So I now have a respect for the White Van driver. Yes, I still think they drive like pricks, but then so do I when behind the wheel of a vehicle with limited visibility, slow mobility and zero air con.

(165 words)

I'm Lost!

On the advice of my addicted friend Edna I have just finishing watching the first season of Lost. While she is practically mugging the postman in the morning just in case another episode arrives from the UK (her ex is taping season 3 and sending it, as it doesn’t screen here until March or something) I have been watching and thinking ‘What were the creators taking when they came up with this show?’ Polar bears, invisible monsters, people stranded for 16 years, drug smugglers, unstable explosives and concrete pods buried in the jungle with a door and no handle. What the?

And why doesn’t anyone suffer from sunburn? Sawyer only had a couple of tubes of sunscreen. By the way…I love his glasses!

I kinda like the way they do the back stories for each of the main characters, and yet I still don’t really like any of them and if they don’t get of the island I wouldn’t care. More importantly I don’t think I’ll be hanging out for season two or three.

While I can see why people would love it, it has drama, comedy (golf course), gore (school teacher +nitro), mystery sexy ‘do anything’ chick (Kate) over acting (Claire) hysterics (Claire again), racial tension (Micheal, Jin and Syide), greasy bit of sexy rough (Sawyer) and of course heroics (Jack, Jack and ohh….Jack). I’ll stick to Alias, also created by JJ Abrams, it just feels a little more real even though it has all of the above!

One last thing, how come Hurley is still moohosive?

(256 words)

Just Shocking!

After a brief stop at the shops on the way home tonight, Hubby and I were driving north with a few lightning strikes going off somewhere in the distance to the left of us. As we continued north the frequency of the lightning increased, but it was still off to the left. When we turned of the freeway (to the left) we started heading towards it.

‘It’s miles away, no problem.’ My hubby stated as I continued to drive.

‘Ohh, that one was close.’ A few minutes later as I recover my eyesight from the flash bulb that went off in front of me.

‘You know, if the car was struck by lightning, the electric circuits would fry, the power steering would fail and the hydraulics of the brakes would stop working,’ he said several more miles into the trip, but still twenty minutes from home.

As I continued to drive, I leaned closer to the steering wheel, I’m not sure how it helped, but the stress levels in the car seemed to rise as the hairs on my arms did from the ionisation of the air. Several times the lightning was close enough to cause momentary blindness, and with 30-40 strikes a minutes it was less than comfortable.

Now…I’ve always liked lightning (for those of you who don’t already know it, I’m a bit odd!), but my experience tonight has taught me, driving towards it and amongst it, isn’t much fun!

When we finally got home, the strikes had eased somewhat, but I had to risk standing the minimal rain and try to get a picture to prove my tale. Out of nearly 600 (thank god for digital) I got six pictures.

Enjoy them ;-).

(269 words)

Shed your Skin

I’ve been a bit quiet since the whole NYE thingy-me-bob. Partially ‘cause I haven’t had anything positive to say, partially ‘cause I’ve been a bit busy trying to get out another Newsletter, despite being firmly in the ‘I don’t give a flying f*ck’ camp after all the calendar fuss back in November.

As you see...not a lot of positive stuff. Anyway, I was sat at the PC tonight, doing said newsletter stuff when Harry decided to supervise from the picture frame above and to the left of the monitor. I don’t have a problem with side-plate sized spiders, so I left him to it.

I looked up a while later and I realised he had been growing and was taking off the old restrictive skin to reveal the new shiny skin underneath.

I’ve decided to do the same...New Years is gone, I’m alive and as healthy as I’m going to be. The Summer issue is nearly finished and it looks sh*t hot, so moaning minnies, bring it on! The old skin has been shed, my new skin looks kinda groovy in cut off jeans shorts and I'm liking it.


UPDATED : 11.31pm 11th Jan 2007 - Huge Hairy Harry (aka Huntsman) - the spider is in the bottom of the picture, the old, shed skin is above.

(188 words)

Happy Birthday!

It has now been 3 days since my little trip to the hospital and I have to say I’m still feeling as rough as guts, but getting better. So this week, I have been mostly drinking Powerade.

I have been using this time to watch reruns of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and I’ve also been thinking...a lot! Buffy is my main stay of ‘feeling ick’ watching ‘cause she is quite frankly a chick that kicks butt even when she has a fever (Killed by Death, Season 2 Episode 18) And if I was to see any of the guys I suspect of doing this to me and Edna I would pin him up against a wall and beat the living crap outta him to the best of my ability, (of course, I would find out if they were the guilty party first;-).

My very own Buffy rabbit in the late 90's

The thinking part of my recovery has been caused by the dreams I’ve been having, I see myself slouched by a wall, naked and unable to move, people walk passed and laugh and point. Some ask ‘Is she dead?’ In reality, I don’t think it was much different, except for the naked part.

So is it a possibility that instead of opening presents with my husband for his birthday today, he could have been arranging my funforall?

(219 words)

The Day After, The Day After the Night Before

Christmas and New Year has come and gone for another twelve months and boy am I glad. I really am a bah-humbug kinda person with the holiday season. I believe it’s for kids and big kids, and I do not fall into either category (at least I don’t think so most of the time).

On Friday last week Edna and I went up to the house for the weekend. We spent time over analysing everything under the sun, including relationships, boy/men, programming and even how quickly wine evaporates once the cork has been removed. After singing ourselves to sleep to Moulin Rouge we woke on Saturday feeling a tad rough but in control. In the evening we went to Miss Eudoxia’s house for dinner. We ate enough food to feed the forty thousand between the six of up present and all of it was divine. Satay sticks, salt and pepper calamari, vol-a-vonts, roast beef with prawn and luscious creamy garlic sauce followed up with pancakes (crepes), strawberries and homemade Mango Ice cream. Thanks Miss E and Fireman Gaz for a lovely evening and introducing us to Master and Miss K.

Sunday, New Year Eve. We drove down to the city, showered, creamed our bodies with perfumed moisturises and prepared ourselves for a night of nights. At 7.15pm we walked into the Lowenbrau Bier Keller, where we were seated for dinner. At approx. 7.30pm our first bier arrived. 500ml (just over a pint) of Franziskaner Dunkel. We ate entrees, massive main and dessert all the while rating famous men on a scale of Pretty boy to Lorry driver. We came to the following conclusions;

1. There are way more Pretty Boys that are famous
2. Some famous people don’t rate being rated on the scale
3. The prettiest of pretty boys are David Beckham, George Clooney and Orlando ‘bloody’ Bloom
4. The bestest of the lorry drivers are Colin Farrell, Robbie and Bruce Willis

After dinner was concluded about 10pm (now two biers and two schnapps) we adjoined to the bar via the Nail Hammering competition. I was promptly disqualified, cause I hit the nail to hard and it bent. Ohh... well:-). We ordered another bier and another schnapps, we chatted with a few guys, including the English Tourist and avoided a couple, at about half eleven when we went outside and ohh and arhhed over the fireworks for twenty minutes or so.

Back inside at 12.45am. We ordered another bier, but I didn’t drink it ‘cause it was the wrong one and yucky, but I did drink the schnapps. Edna was sat next to the English Tourist from earlier, and suddenly I had to go to the loo...I was violently ill, but had the sense to clean the seat before leaving the ladies. I need water and I need it now! The security guard told me I had to leave...I need water! I was escorted up the stairs to the courtyard... I couldn’t see Edna and I could no longer see the stairs. I ping ponged across the courtyard and to the outside world...I need water...somehow I managed to cross the road before leaning on a pillar. I slid down the pillar no longer able to stand...I need water...before falling to my side and depositing the remaining contents of my stomach on the pavement...I need water...I got out my phone and somehow despite not being able to see the screen sent a text to Edna saying ‘outside opposite’. I put my phone back in my bag and tried to stand, I couldn’t, I was a rag doll, I couldn’t hold my head up, my legs would not move, I was leaning heavily on my right arm...I need wat...

‘Here drink this, you need water.’ A male voice said to me, placing a plastic cup of ice cold water in my hand. I drank it, I needed it!
‘Can you stand?’ he asked, I think I said ‘I need to walk home.’
‘I’ll make sure you get there.’ he said. I later found out his name was John and he was 18 and it was 5.30am. He did walk me home, bless his heart and brought me 3 litres of water, which I drank. He left me at my front door and I have no idea what we talked about the walk home except that he was at university, from a wealthy family (that was expecting him home) and that he had yet ‘to experience the love of a woman.’

After 5 hours of sleep I awoke to the phone ringing, it was Edna. She was home, but could not remember getting there. I had sent the text message at 1.45am.

I got out of bed and drank some water...it promptly reappeared. I drank some more and it reappeared again...this continued until about 2.30pm when I had a shower and on the advice of Miss E went to the hospital. I was severely dehydrated and after telling the nurse my story, they tested me for drugs. It was confirmed that someone had slipped me “rohypnal”. I was given an anti-vomit jab and sent home with instructions to drink plenty of water. So I did and watched Grease and Grease 2 until going to bed.

Today, I have slept and been to the police station. I’ve just ordered pizza. I will over analyse this state of affairs when I stop feeling so shite.

(894 words)

Chillin' Chrimble

It’s Christmas day and I’m home alone. Hubby has flown to the UK to see his Grandmother who is in hospital after hip surgery. My plan to relax, do nothing and watch telly with the cats by my side.

And that I did once I had dragged my backside from my pit. I showered and went for a walk into Chinatown, had sushi for lunch then sauntered home to watch Only Fools and Horses.

UKTV on Foxtel were having a special all day of OF&H so being English it was my duty...no, my honour, to sit and observe the traditional Christmas episode after Christmas Lunch.

I find it bewildering that the one day of the year that we are allowed, neigh, expected to sit and do nothing, most choose to have one of the busiest days of the year. I have a girlfriend who is having neighbours over for a champagne breakfast, followed lunch with her Dad then dinner with her in-laws. Another friend has chosen to visit someone she hasn’t seen for several years.

For me, it was relaxing. I spoke to those I wanted to speak to (mostly the cats), I ate what I wanted to (grilled haloumi with oregano and lemon) and watched what I wanted to watch (the world go by and OF&H). I know this isn’t everybody’s idea of ideal, but for me, just this year it was.

I hope you all had a wonderful day and that 2007 brings you all that you hope and wish for.


(253 words)

ANTM 7-11 & 7-12

Once again I’ve got a little behind in my America’s Next Top Model watching, it may be because I’ve been busy having a life! Christmas silly season has been well and truly good to me but not to my liver.

Episode 7-11

Caridee made out with one of the Spanish male models from the previous episodes, after dinner when they came around for dinner one night. The next day Tyra asked what they thought was the toughest criticism during judging. The girls all made stuff up, but Melrose, of course, kissed arse.

The challenge this week was the go-see. This is a casting test were the girls have to rush round and see as many of the 10 designers expecting them in the allowed time (in this case 4 hours). They are marked on, 1.Appearance, 2. Runway Walk, 3. Personality and 4. Portfolio. Once again Melrose won the challenge with 5 go-sees and being back on time. The twins were late and were disqualified. She picked Caridee as her companion to share her prize of a personal chef for the evening.

The Only active bullring in Barcelona was the location of the photo shoot with Nigel Barker (judge and fashion photographer) in charge. During the preparations while Nigel was waving a rod at the bull, Caridee asked ‘Did you just remove that from your ass from the last panel?’ Later she was chewed out by Mr. J in front of the other girls for showing lack of respect.

Michelle got a great review for her shoot, Melrose stuffed it up by being wooden and Caridee apologised but still screwed up the shoot.

The judging panel was a toughy. Each girl had to say who they thought had the most potential and who had the least. Melrose picked herself and Eugena. Eugena picked herself and Amanda. Caridee picked herself and Amanda. Amanda picked Eugena as having the most potential and Caridee as the least. Michelle picked Caridee and herself.

The Twins were the bottom two and Michelle went home after sacrificing herself for her sister who wants it more.

Episode 7-12

Flamenco lessons saw the paired up with four professional dancers. Eugena got the thumbs up from the teacher for picking up the steps so quickly. Amanda had two left feet. Miss J. joined them all for dinner and Melrose sucked up big time.

The next day they had to dance in full flamenco costume. Eugena did well and even managed to smile while dancing, proving finally that she can do more than one thing at a time. Melrose who ‘have my steps mastered’ forgot her steps. Eugena won the challenge and picked Amanda as her companion. Melrose pouted and then cried ‘cause she takes dancing very seriously and din’t like being judged. Then again, I would have cried too if I’d been made to wear a baby blue polka dot dress!
The girls where paired up to be water-nymphs for the photo shoot with Tyra coaching them. The water in the swimming pool was so cool all the girls had chatter teeth, but Caridee was treated for hypothermia.

With only four girls left, the bitchy comments have stepped up a notch with Eugena calling Amanda gangly and Melrose even shooting nasty looks during judging.

Judging panel saw Caridee and Amanda in the bottom two. Despite Michelle’s efforts last week, Amanda went home.

In next weeks season final Caridee, Melrose and Eugena fight it out for the title of America’s Next Top Model. And, you dear readers can breathe a sigh of relief at it all being over!

Merry Christmas!

(608 words)

Tarmac to Robbie Vol 3 (long, but the final part :-)

Monday morning passed us all (Edna, Hubby and I) by in a rapid movement of the eye. After the excesses of the previous evening and early hours of the morning, by the time we got out of the hotel it was lunchtime.

So we made our way out to Richmond and a place called Pearl on the recommendation of a friend of Edna’s. We were armed with a business card and nothing else except the comment of ‘it’s rather nice.’ So we walk through the door, dressed in jeans and t-shirts and the man at the desk says ‘How may I help you?’
‘Are you here for the restaurant?’
I have been told I looked at him blankly, but I was thinking - No, we’re here for the monkeys on bicycles -
He asked again, but this time hubby jumped in with the sensible answer to his questions ‘Yes, lunch, bar menu outside, fine. Thank you.’ Before steering me out to the table and away from the full-on three course extravaganza that was happening inside. While we waited to order we watched a very tall man in a grey suit park his black Mercedes in a No-parking zone and walk in. Our waiter informed us that he was the head of Village Cinemas and always gets a parking ticket with his lunch. The extremely lovely light lunch of Steak sandwiches and noodles (see picture) was delivered but our happy waiter, wine was drunk, but when wind started to impair our enjoyment we moved into the bar area for dessert and more wine to match. Orange Blossom ice cream and an obscene almond milk jelly was consumed by Edna, Turkish Delight with Rose ice cream saw its way slowly into my tummy and hubby had dumplings with three chocolates. It was all divine until we got the bill, but then we should have known we weren’t going to be having a $15 dollar lunch when we saw the Mother-of-Pearl walls.

A quick trip to Prahran saw Edna and Hubby relaxing in a pub drinking cider, while I nipped to the local Antique book store. They had a copy of an out of print book I have been eyeing for a while and now they don’t. It’s mine! ;-) A walk along Chapel Street revealed many treasures including this gem of a Greengrocers shop called Rocky's/

Back across town a couple of hours later, we had finally found somewhere to eat near the Telstra Dome. Trixy was there, Bob and Mick, so a table of six in the corner. Very nice food but it was all over too soon. We were off the concert. We left T,B and M to finish their food while we made out way to our seats high in the clouds and million miles from the stage. To be fair to the ‘special Inner Sanctum seats’ we had a really good view of the overall show.

Robbie Williams was fantastic! He looked wired, or maybe it was just knackered as this was his last tour of a world tour that has been going since the start of the year. I know he’s released another album in the time and had some time off, but he must be exhausted, poor baby. He danced, sweated, strutted, and sat his way through two hours of pure entertainment. He sang ‘Me and my Shadow’ with Jonny Wilkes and Kids with his back up singers. He put on his special Addidas white hoodie when he encored with Rudebox.

About halfway through the evening (about 10.15, he came on a 9pm) he was talking about the concert he did in Brisbane and how he’d been told off for smoking in the Non-Smoking venue. He said ‘I know this is a non-smoking venue too but let’s face it sometime I just fancy a fag’ then took a really long drag from his cigarette. He went on o say ‘This is for all the impressionable kiddies out there, I am NOT a role model!’ That’s Shane Warne’s job.’ The audience cheered and then chanted Warney for about thirty seconds.
He broke the record for a performance at the Telstra Dome with 66,500 people. The previous record is about 57,000.

GO ROBBIE!

The following morning we were a little worse for wear, but didn’t care too much. The concert had been fantastic and any dramas from the previous night were not quite forgotten but certainly not being dwelled upon except by the drama creator. Eggs Benedict (salmon and spinach) set us up for ta day of doing the rest of the things we wanted to do while in Melbourne. A trip to the Philatelic Centre, a picture of Purple Trees (jacaranda) a Christmas pressie purchase and a trip to Crown Casino. Edna lost $10 at Roulette, then I won $20 at Roulette, then I cashed in my chips (‘cause I couldn’t find a $5 Blackjack table) and gave hubby and Edna $2 each for the pokies. He won $18 and Edna won $12. So all in all we came out, up. A great end to an overall great long weekend.

Tarmac to Robbie - Vol 2

Once Hubby and Edna got back from the Best Eggs Benedicts in Melbourne I was prised from my pit, showered and dressed, then we all took off on out walking tour of the City of Melbourne. After perusing some very fine stores, such as Leghorn, a custom made tie and suit shop that we can’t remember the name of, an equally yummy jewellery shop in a side alley and the Lord of the Fries (a cup of hand cut chips with mayo that prompted an ANTM style photo shoot once again, the mayo was better than the self proclaimed ‘best chips in Melbourne’) before getting on the City Circle tram.

After seeing the Eagle that guards Docklands we walked through the ‘wetlands’ park which was more of a puddle. Edna and I relived our youth with a swing on the ehh… swings before I behaved like a complete bogan and rolled down the hill like a five year old. I think I may have regressed a few years too many! ;-)

The walk around the dockland took us passed the ‘cow in a tree’, which apparently represents drought and famine, whatever! To the New Quay and many bars, restaurants and ice cream parlours. The Bar was first, were we topped up energy levels with Magners and wedges at the James Squire Brewhouse were I also happened to prove my age by spilling Sweet Chilli Sauce down the front of my white top. After some examination and flashing to other patrons we moved onto having cones at the Limoncetto. Handmade ice cream in the flavours of Caramel, cherry, strawberry, mango and the special, which happened to be Lemon sorbet. Very Yum!

A kerfuffle with trams and a bit of over sun exposure later we arrived at David Jones for a tad or retail therapy. Hubby was also a tad, exasperated that is! Edna ended up purchasing a rather fetching burnt orange belted dress, while I replaced my sweet Chilli stained white t-shirt with a rather nice green shirt.

Dinner took place after a brief stop over at The European Bier Café. Were I thought Edna was going to have a fit when the barmaid tried to pour her Erdinger Dunkel into a glass quickly! After a brief education the barmaid was aware, but unimpressed, that despite the Germans being efficient, an Erdinger is poured slowly until just before the end when you swill the last liquid to mix the yeast before pouring into the glass to produce the head. We downed our drinks rapidly before running to the ‘Best Sushi Train in Melbourne’ for dinner.

Tomodachi, the self proclaimed ‘best sushi train in Melbourne’ may be the best train, but it sure isn’t the best selection or the cheapest. Apart from the Smoked Salmon/Prawn/eel/caviar/cress do-dad on a gold plate ($7.50) everything was pretty ordinary, and better at Sushi Bus on Oxford Street in Sydney, and we would have earned over 50 points at Sushi Bus towards our next meal.

Back to the Euro Bier Café for after dinner drinks and plenty Erdingers consumed before adjourning to our hotel suite with Pink and Red (lovely jubbly bubbly) in tow. Dancing to ‘Floorfillers’ ended the evening with daft dancing and a cuppa tea!

(533 words)

Tarmac to Robbie - Vol 1

After a fun ‘Santa in leather chaps’ trip to Hellfire on Friday night with Edna, we got up four hours after leaving to commence the long drive to Melbourne. We were starting a weekend long exodus to see Robbie Williams in concert. In the car was Hubby driving, me in the front passenger seat and Edna lounging in the backseat like the superstar that she is. We had snacks, drink and music!

Just as we turned onto Flinders Street someone asked ‘Are we there yet?’

Two hours later we arrived in Goulburn to see the ‘Big Marina’. This is more commonly known as the Big Merino and is a forty metre high concrete sheep on the edge of town and the only tourist attraction within 50kms. We saw the good s for sale before climbing the stairs to the lookout point on top. At the top of six flights of stairs we were treated to spy holes looking out over housing estates and boards filled with such gems as ‘dress your children in wool’ along with a picture of a child dressed in nylon going up in flames.

Two hours later we arrived at the next tourist attraction. The stunning, awe inspiring and shockingly small ‘Dog on a Tucker Box’. The sign on the Hume Highway, which was the size of a house directed us with only 500m to go. So with urgency we indicated to the right and made the turn. After driving around the car park, we found it. A fountain with a bronze dog sitting on a god damn lunch box! After a photo shoot that would put Americas Next Tip Model to shame we were back on the road.

Two hours later and after a brief nap for the passengers we arrived in Holbrook. A small town that has the National Museum of Australian Pottery, a craft shop and a 90 metre submarine. Not bad for a town 400kms for the nearest ocean. A brief stop and climb and drink saw us refreshed for the next few hours in the car.

After the submarine, we were convinced there could be nothing else to see in NSW, but we were proven wrong by the National Truck Drivers Memorial. Practically a Mecca for Edna, all we need is the Pretty Boys Memorial and we’ll be complete!

The NSW/Vic border came and went in the blink of an eye except the brief tourist photo shoot.

Suddenly Seymour was upon us. Actually it took 200kms, but every time we saw to the sign and shouted ‘Feed Me’. It was funny for about 100ks, then we played the Movie game which took us up to Glenrowan. A town known to be the place were Ned Kelly was finally caught, we managed to get a few good pictures of the Giant Ned before moving on! After all Ned and his blood soaked miniature pony auditioned for a 4th member of their gang here, so they were bound to be caught.
Just before dusk we finally rolled into Melbourne. Through the art lined highways and bad driving, we navigated our way to the hotel.

After dumping the bags we walked to the South Bank and consume sustenance. Edna tucked into Muscles in vodka and caviar. Hubby had Pan Fried Atlantic Salmon in ‘sauce’ and potatoes and I gnawed my way through the toughest Duck Breast in the south hemisphere. My advice would be that the Bistro Vite is anything but Quick!

(580 words)

Second Adolescence

It official, It seems I'm going through puberty AGAIN!

I went to see my ‘gal’ today for a spot of waxing before Christmas and we got to talking about the condition of my skin. Now, those of you that know, I’m 34, those of you that didn’t; now you do ;-). For the last couple of months my skin has been crazy spotty. Chin, nose, back, chest, even in my hair, it’s gross, trust me. It gets worse, twenty minutes after I’ve washed my face, cleansed, toned and applied a light moisturiser my face feels like I’ve got over zealous with the spray cooking oil.

It’s not even as if I’m eating crisps and greasy crap...I live on fresh fruit, rich rolls, veggies, sushi and meat (not a lot of chocolate although it does sneak in on occasion and I partial to jelly). And I drink getting on for two litres of water a day as well and green tea.

So, we were discussing my skin, what’s changed? New moisturiser? No. New shampoo? No. Are you having more sex? No more than usual.

Then I remembered, about three months ago I went off the pill due to my high blood pressure (the pill can increase bp), for the first time since I went on it when I was 14.

‘Well, that’s it then. You’re going through puberty, properly!’

I must make a Doctor’s appointment so she can put a stop to it.


(240 words)

I’m a Switcher

I switched to the new version of blogger. You need to have a Google account to sign in.

It takes a while to convert it, so I would suggest you don't press the 'convert' button at half past midnight just before a quick update.

Otherwise, I think it's the same so far.