Notoriety

In 1968 Andy Warhol said, ‘In the future, everyone will be world-famous for 15 minutes.’ This saying has now become legend and part of everybody’s dream as they grow up.

A famous doctor, movie star, chef, dog whisper, artist or writer. It may be a competition win, treatment of a special case, being so good at what you do you just happen to get your own show or, as in my case, you answer an advert because you think you might be able to do something.

A few weeks ago I responded to an advert by a Talent Agency that was looking for ‘new faces’. Why not, I thought, what have I got to lose?

Two weeks after registering I got a call, ‘Would you like to play QC in the new big law production by the RST?’

‘Yeah, why not, I can do those dates’.

Thursday was Day One. I had to take three suits and low-key jewelry and be there at 0745.

There was a bit of waiting around, then I was called into the courtroom with 20 other extras. I was front row, centre General Public. For three hours I watched a guy ‘Matt’, push his way to his seat next to ‘Bernie’, over and over again then listen to a ‘barrister’ grill the ‘bad guy’. I must have seen it 20 times, seen cameras move position, make-up refreshed, lights moved and blooper reel classics. Not once did I get bored.

Lunch was provided and it was amazing. The catering guys were culinary genius!

In the afternoon I got pulled out of General Public and put in a seat next to the ‘Barrister’ to be ‘Solicitor that leans in’

Yes…’Solicitor that leans in’!

I shall henceforth be known as iLean.

I spent the afternoon sitting in an extremely uncomfortable chair that was too tall for my short legs next to ‘Tanya’, pretending to scribe the entire scene while leaning the prop folder and notepad on my knees.

In total about eight minutes of the programme was film in over ten hours of filming. It's hard work, and people who partake of this form of employment full time make it look easy and deserve the compensations they receive.

It’s entirely possible I’ll end up on the cutting room floor. But I may, just may, get my first few minutes of fame.

Happy Birthday

Yesterday would have been Muv’s 59th birthday. We would have likely gone for a Doris in the afternoon, seeing as it was Sunday, had afternoon tea at her favourite garden centre before taking the dog for a walk.

I had afternoon tea in my garden and I did some gardening. I didn’t take my dog for a walk, she was too busy eating a chicken bit she’d dug up from the freshly turned veggie patch. Muv would have approved.

I think about Muv a lot on her birthday. It’s only natural I guess. It was the one day of the year that she truly loved and looked forward to. She didn’t like the rapidly approaching six ohh number, but she was realistic about it, and being the vibrant person she was, she laughed it off. Often I’d just tell her how old I would be next birthday, she’d roll her eyes and say, ‘stop it’. Sometimes she'd share how she felt turning that age. I remember when she turned 40.

For the last few years, since her death I have purchased sunflowers on her birthday and, using her urn as a vase, remembered her and celebrated her life with the flowers she held so dear. This year due to job and financial status, the flowers will have to wait, hopefully just a couple of weeks, but she’ll get her sunflowers. Their smiling faces looking out at me as I work and potter in the kitchen. I think I’ll plant some in the garden next spring.

What would she have though about being 59? She’d have hated it, but she’d have embraced it. Had fun with it and maybe had an extra G’n’T, becasue it was her birthday :-)

Happy Birthday Muv.

In Goolwa SA - August 2002

Beef

I brought some beef mince from the butcher this morning. I put it in the fridge as soon as I got home.

I gave some to the cats and the dog. I used the rest in a bolognese mix, Some of which I had for dinner with bread and butter.

Two of the cats have thrown it up, and I have chronic wind. I fear things don't bode well for a restful night.

Still Going

I’ve been working hard for the last few weeks, but I have failed to earn a single dollar.

I’ve completed a Funeral Celebrants course and started speaking with and visiting Funeral Directors in order to actually start performing funeral ceremonies and start earning cash. I’ve also gatecrashed a few to see how they go.

I have secured a job as a bus driver, through attendance of an open evening and two interviews, but it doesn’t start until 16th April.

I’ve been taking photographs like crazy (Jurassic Lounge, Street Fashion, comedy gigs) to try and get someone to want me to do a paid gig…naddar, nothing, zilch. I’ve raised awareness of my photography with my Facebook page. Loads of pavement pounding and conversations.

I’ve built up two Facebook pages to help build my celebrancy business and FC Images.

I’ve been to four interviews but I have yet to hear whether I’ve got the job., for any of them. Is no news good news?

I've been told I'm over qualified by Bunnings, coffee shops, cleaning firms, State Transit and a major supermarket chain.

Brock Talent Management have taken me onto their books and I’ve secured an extra gig to play either a barrister or a QC in an ABC drama. Unlikely that I’ll get paid for four to six weeks after the gig.

I’ve been trawling the internet and papers daily for job openings…private company sites, job boards, newspapers (local and national). I’ve applied for over 60 roles. Roles that fit my background exactly, roles that loosely fit, and roles completely left of centre. Each application has had a unique cover letter and CV tweak.

Tupperware now has me on the books as a Party Demonstrator. I can feel IQ points leaking from my ears at each ‘training’ session I attend, but you have to go to them.

Still not a penny inward, lots out though. At this point I’d like to thank GB and LK for helping me out with my rent.

This financial situation needs to change very soon before I become homeless, penniless and so despondent that I lose the energy and ability to continue this pursuit of employment. I’m having days and bad days.

For now though, the pursuit continues. Wish me luck!

Unemployed

On the 16th February at 10am I walked into a weekly update meeting and walked out ten minutes later unemployed.

My services as a change management consultant where no longer required as the client had decided they could run the change with internal employees. I've seen this before. The CM writes all the plans for change, communication and training and the business you're working for starts seeing you as an expense that can be done without. After all…any idiot can follow a plan.

Three or four months before go-live the client realises that the in-house change management was so what lacking and hires someone like me back to clean up the mess.

This is the nature of contracting and consulting.

This is all well and good when the market is buoyant, but when the job market is in favour of the employer, as it is now, it's on the sucky end of the scale.

In recent days I have been applying for change management roles that have had more than 100 applicants. In the last two week I've had time wasting agent interviews with only two agents.

Will work for tips.

A Memory

Despite the band splitting up before I was born, I grew up listening to The Monkees. Muv was just a teenager when they were at the height of their fame and she continued to pass her love for them on in the years that followed.

One of the few programs I remember from childhood is the Monkees.

In 1988, when I was 15, The Monkees came to the UK for a short concert tour. Micky, Peter (the one with the hat) and Davey where there. Michael was absent after a falling out with the band some years earlier.

Despite living in Chichester we drove to Bournemouth to see then. I was very excited, it was only the second concert I’d been to, Howard Jones was the first. The trip between Chichester and Bournemouth is 48 miles (or 77km). We hit the back of traffic queue about 15 miles outside Chichester.

‘Do you think the queue is for the concert.’

I was young and innocent.

Muv laughed about it for years.

I still listen to The Monkees, usually when I’m cleaning or gardening. Their upbeat sound has always been a energiser for me. I know they haven’t produced any new music for a while, but Davy Jones made his mark on the music industry.

A boy from Manchester who made another musical David Jones change his name to David Bowie.

He gave us the outstanding ‘Daydream Believer’ and ‘A little bit me, A little bit you’ and ‘Randy Scouse Git’

You knew you were short, we all knew you were short, but that didn’t stop us from loving you.

May you Rest in Peace Mr. Davy Jones
1945 - 2012