Name Calling

I was appalled this morning when I heard a man call a woman a 'retard'.

On my way to the platform after I'd purchased my train ticket from the ticket office I was walking passed the automated machines. There are two, side by side. Man had just completed his transaction when Woman, who'd just started hers, dropped some coins. There wasn't a queue behind either of them. As he walked passed her, he spat out 'retard' at her. She flinched. Pick up the coin and put it in the machine.

This exchange took part in the blink of an eye. If I'd been closer to the ticket office or platform stair I would have missed the schoolboy comment. But I didn't. I was in a perfect position to witness the entire thing.

A 40+ year old man bullying a woman in her 30s.

As you'll see from the photo below he's less than a perfect specimen of manhood. You can't see the top of his head, but it is somewhat devoid of shagpile. And yet he felt the need to call someone, a stranger, an inappropriate name. What effect would that one word from a stranger have on her day? Did she already have fragile self esteem; did that word shatter what was left of hers? How would he like it if someone called him baldy or Kojack?

The charming specimen of manhood

I'd rather be called a 'f*cker' than a 'retard'. It true for starters, but it isn't an insult to all those that do have learning difficulties.

I find the whole idea of name calling so unnecessary and cruel. Why did he have to say anything to her, let alone call her names? Clearly they did not know each other. Wouldn't it have been a nicer, more humane gesture to assist with the coin collection? No, he called her names and then sat on the platform for 10 minutes; he was clearly in a hurry to catch his train.

This brings me to my next point about name calling. Said with love name calling, is there really such a thing? I have a group of friends that call each other names. A couple of them call one guy a retard all the time, he doesn't seem to mind, but have they ever asked how it makes him feel? I know that when one was called a 'bogan', she got most upset and pouted for a week. in this case it's deemed to be 'affectionate' name calling, but really, when is name calling ever affectionate? Clearly bogan didn't think it was all that affectionate and yet she continues to call others names.

I was called names when I was at school. Specy, four eyes, teacher's pet, swot, banger (I was into metal music), dumbo (I was in remedial Maths class) and boarder. I went to a school that had day and boarding students. Muv, after my parents separated was the cook, then house mistress in the school. Day/Boarder rivalry was rampant and it was considered a massive stinger to get in a boarder shot, even though I didn't board. Kids hah!?

Having been on the receiving end in my time I'm very reluctant to engage in such behaviour now and this morning I found myself holding back from the man. I imagined the scenario would have gone something like this:

'Morning fat so'

'Excuse me?'

'Oh, I'm sorry, I thought we were greeting people by insulting them now'

At that point I see myself lying on the ground with a black eye; after all, bullies will invariably lash out when challenged or confused.