Landlords

I’m slightly confused by how dumb people can be. When I say people I mean my landlord.

I’ve lived in the house I’m in for just over a year. When I moved in the fireplace and ceiling fan in the dining room were marked as working. Neither were and I ended up paying $330 to have the ceiling fan replaced and waiting nearly six months for the landlords to pay-up to have the fireplace fixed. We were already nearly two months into cold weather by the time they got around to it.

Now summer is rapidly approaching and the house with no cooling is heating up. So I posed a question to my landlord. Would you consider installing ceiling fans if I paid 50% of the cost? I provided them with three quotes.

I wasn't asking for anything fancy like this little beauty

They came back with the reply of ‘You may install the ceiling fans at your own cost’. Sounds like a bargain to me. Not!

Shorty after this exchange, I discovered that due the landlords having the bills sent here directly I had over paid the water bill by over $520. So I went back with the following suggestion.

‘Please install the ceiling fans by Christmas and you don’t need to reimburse me for the overpaid water bills.’

I’m pretty sure this reads as I’ll pay for the ceiling fans and improve your property with my own money.

Last night at half past midnight I received an email from the landlord asking for my bank details.

Is it just me that thinks these people are clearly idiots to refuse this offer? (Yes, I understand I’m a bit strange for offering, but I really need some cool air this summer) Meanwhile, I plan on buying a kickarse big fan and taking it with me when I move out.

Stranger things have happened

I confess, I can’t think of many, but I’m sure they have.

The weather has turned cold in Sydney. Those of you that live here will know what I speak off, those that reside in other, far flung place, may not. On average Sydney gets seven days of temperatures below five degrees overnight in Winter. We’re still in Autumn and we have clocked up nearly two week of frosts. FROST! In Sydney. It’s almost unheard of.

Now, I’m not really one to complain about the weather, I like cold days with sunshine. Not too keen on wind or rain, but those lovely crisp days when the sun shines and the flowers still smile, make my heart sing. Thanks to a southerly coming up from Antarctica we’re getting those kind of days.

When I moved in November I moved my belonging into a house with a real fireplace. One you put logs in. I was told when I took up residence that it was in good working order, I found out on February, that it wasn’t. The baffle (the think steel plate just below the chimney hole) was melted through and it was missing several insulation bricks. After much tooing and frowing, the Landlord finally decreed that they would pay for the repairs. Of course, this was just as every man and his dog also wanted their chimneys and fireplaces serviced. So I’m on a list...he’s coming on 21st May.

The cold snap has been here for a few weeks now and the house was becoming as cold inside as outside. It was inhumane, to me, my housemate S and the animals. When you can see your breath inside, it’s too cold. So I lit the fire.

After three days the baffle snapped in half and fell out.

Fan heaters didn’t do a bad job for a couple of days, then the temperature dropped again. On Saturday, I’d had enough of not being able to feel my fingers so I lit the fire. Baffle and bricks be damned...I needed heat.

The smell of the wood, the heat that filled the room, the gentle roar and the glow in the house brought out the domestic goddess. I baked bread, I cooked lamb shanks and I felt like making biscuits. I never really want to cook. I’m sure it was the influence of the real fire burning in the corner. Maybe it’s a primal instinct to make home and nest. Maybe, and I think this may be it, it was the years of a real fire as a child when we’d spend time in the kitchen in the colder months (most of the year in the UK) baking cakes, Muv made a mean Victoria Sponge, making sweeties (rum truffle or clotted cream fudge anyone?), Yum Yum Pie, Bread and Butter pudding and all manner of other goodies. Muv was a regular Barbara Good. There was always a cake in the cupboard.

The bread has gone and due to lack of ingredients the only sweet treat I could make was Honey Joys. I had sugar, butter, honey and cornflakes in the cupboard, but as I didn’t have any paper cases I made giant ones in pate ramekins. It was a bit of fun.

I’ve been out and purchased baking things...almonds, castor and icing sugar, vanilla essence, condensed milk, and a couple of things to try a Jamie Oliver recipe. I’m even thinking of doing what Julie Powell did, but unlike her, rather than a book of savouries’ and general Frenchieness, I thought I'd work my way through the Baking Bible.