Goodbye 2007

Ohh … I can’t be arsed, maybe another day!

Happy 2008 everyone. May the New Year bring you all that you desire.

I’ll be seeing the new year in alone watching Rocky Horror happy in the knowledge that Walter the pigeon I saved from the side of the street the other has a lovely new aviary to stretch his wings in and tomorrow I need to do some wasp nest destruction.


- One of three little nest attached to walls of my house (about an inch across)


- The largest of four nests attached to walls of my house (about five inches across)

Jebus' Birthday

So…it’s Christmas Day and I have a cat asleep on my bed and an orphan pigeon in my laundry basket outside. I’ve watched The Ice Harvest, V The final battle and just about to watch Wild Wild West while drinking champagne. Does it get much better than this?

I’m feeling much better, but not 100%, so entries with be sparse but hopefully back to my usual witty self.

Happy Christmas All!

FUBAR

I decided to stop writing for a while. I don’t know how long it will be, a few days, a week, a month. I have no idea.

I hit the top of the slope described in an earlier entry about lunch time yesterday and now I’m sliding down on my arse at a rate of knots. I don’t feel up to being witty or happy joy joy. This is when I need my friends and they don't seem to be there. So I’m off to deal with this myself, in my own corner.

I may or may not be a while.

I Walked into a Cupboard Door

Someone said something to me on Friday that made me really look at the way I live. I was told that I was in an abusive relationship, but I think she was joking.

I have some marks on the back of my right hand and when called on it by a lady at work I made excuses, I told her it was my fault. I was hugging him too hard; I moved too quick, it was an accident. This is not the first time I’ve made excuses. I do it regularly.

Over the weekend I realized I jump when he says jump, I serve him dinner as soon as he sits in the correct position, I open and close doors and groom on demand. I even move over in the bed so I don't disturb him when he's sleeping.

Is it really possible to be in an abusive relationship with a cat?

Note To Self

Do not watch Titanic when you've had a few glasses of wine and you're on your own. It can only lead to tears. Especially when you see the old couple lying on the bed together as water rushes around them.

I Swear To God I'll turn this Car Round!

If you haven't already seen it, see Little Miss Sunshine. I know I'm way behind the eight ball on this ...I finally got around to seeing it tonight and I nearly peed my pants laughing.

Great cast, great jokes, great heartstring tuggers and amazing ending!

Grandpa: [to Dwayne] Fuck a lotta women, kid, I have no reason to lie to you. Not just one, a lotta women.

Briefly, A Weeks News

Monday

My Monday morning started with the delightful tale of modern day Maori gouging out the eyeballs of a 14 year old because they believed she was cursed and they saw the devil in her eyes. Surely in the first years of the twenty first century people don’t think they can get away with this type of sh*t?

And how about this … Julia Gillard, our new Deputy Prime Minister says she supports saying sorry for the actions of those in the past, but can’t say when it will happen under the new Labour government. Big bloody surprise there then!

In sport was the news (if you can really call it news) the Aaron Baddeley (who I hear you cry) nearly gave up golf because he was home sick, ohh yeah and he won something.

Tuesday

Tuesday morning saw the passing of asbestos campaigner Bernie Banton, he was 61. He is responsible for James Hardie admitting that asbestos is bad for you when they set up a $4billion compensation fund for those suffer from asbestos related-diseases.

Also it appears that the image Ian Fleming projected about a secret agent being a suave international playboy has continued into the twenty-first century. MI5 are having issues with recruitment. ‘The names Bond…,’ All together now!

Wednesday

In Music News, the Police are embarking on a reunion tour and 15th June 2008 they will be playing to a small crowd in Newport on the Isle of Wight.

This one made me late for work. Crown Street was shut. Shame Indian Chilli is going, they did a really yummy butter chicken and sag aloo.

At the 2007 Literary Review prize night Norman Mailer was awarded (posthumously) the Bad Sex in Fiction Award for his references to ‘her sap’ and ‘his old battering ram’.

Thursday

Why can’t the girl be named, but the boy in this rape case, can be. Incidentally, she was one of the rapists.

The duck need to be protected in Tasmania according to Chris Simcox as, ‘the numbers are dire’

Kevin Rudd our new prime minister elect has selected his cabinet today. He picked a nice feminine Victorian piece for the families and housing room and an ex-pop-star for the environmental and arts studio.

Friday

Why does a man who spent a night in a boat with his friend make the news? Now if he’d been eaten by a shark I could understand it.

The Hollywood Writers Guild has taken a four day recess to consider a deal that includes payment for works shown on the internet. Who are they kidding, they don’t really expect to get payments from all those bootlegs version too do they?

A man confessed to a murder that he could have got away with in Korea overnight. I not quite sure considering he had broken bones from an exploding mobile phone injury.

Down in The Dumps

Take the title as a hint of what this entry in about please. I’m feeling down in the dumps.

I realized today that over the last few months I had a bit of a time of it all. I left my husband (yes, I know self inflicted), my good girlfriend seems to have found better or more interesting friends and seems to have abandoned me despite me asking if everything is ok, my other good girlfriend is always at work and even when she isn’t lift f*ing miles away. My bestest bud went back to the States because the umbilical cord had stretched too far and was starting to hurt. I was robbed, I seem to have an infestation of mozzies, I don’t have air-con and the house is getting hotter. And I’m currently broke because of excess goodbye do’s and a couple of days sick.

Ohh yeah… and we can’t seem to sell the god-damn house on the Central Coast. Hubby keeps doing things to the house and car and not telling me because he thinks I can’t afford it, so I use the car and find new tyres, or I go to the house and find out there’s a new pool pump and cover. I may not be able to afford to assist, but I wish he’d tell me before so at least I can feel guilty before I’m trying to have a little fun. And I have to have the conversation with the woman who sold us a duff alpaca that can’t have babies.

I was also told the other day that no one will give me income protection becasue of my kidneys. So I have to save about 6 months of salary just in-case I get sick.

This morning I had trouble getting out of bed despite a decent amount, but restless sleep. I’ve been having trouble with sleep recently and I couldn’t put my finger on why. I think I may have figured it out. I’ve reached my limit of shit. I can’t take much more before I hit the top of the extremely slippery slope into depression.

I know I’m not there yet, but I can feel it coming. Having been there, done that before, I can feel the signs. Not wanting to get up, not being bothered to get dressed at the weekend, having an ironing pile that has strata levels, not eating ( I can’t be arsed to cook for just me) and just general malaise.

Not even the prospect of Cycle 9 of America's Next Top Model is cheering me up.

When I stop having my hair cut and painting my toe nails, please take me to the doctor.

RIP Indian Chilli

It was all over the news yesterday. The Indian Chilli had to be demolished. Overnight the building had started to shift causing a huge crack to appear between it and the building next door. The whole row of shops was evacated.

The owner of the building is blaming the city council for undermining his property during works to the community centre next door, but this may be because he doesn’t have building insurance. D’oh!

Being a local and a regular diner I had to see what was going on. I took some pictures with my mobile during the day, then went back later with my other camera to take some after shots.

As I sat on the wall taking 'after' pictures, a couple of builder types sat down next to me and asked why I was so interested in a heap of rubble. I explained that they did a really good Butter Chicken and Sag Aloo, and that I had purchased poppadums only the night before.

‘I won’t tell you what it was like out the back then.’ He said.


- Just an itsy bitsy crack between the white building doing an impression of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

- Not feeling so much like a famous landmark now!

Guidelines

D, a lady I work with (and have many deep an meaningful conversations and belly laughs with) sent one of the annoying inspiration emails that seem to be so prolific. You know, read this and pass the love to ten of your friends or you’ll burn in hell. This one didn’t say that and I kinda liked the sentiment and the little drawings, so enjoy.

HOW TO STAY YOUNG ...

1. Throw out non-essential numbers. This includes age, weight, and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay them.

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. (Keep this in mind if you are one of those grouches!)

3. Keep learning: Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain get idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer's!

4. Enjoy the simple things

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath. And if you have a friend who makes you laugh, spend lots and lots of time with her/him !


6. The tears happen: Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is with us our entire life, is our self. LIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love: Whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.


8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love, that you love them - at every opportunity.

And if you don't send this to at least four people - who cares?

Nothing, Nothing Relax

I've done nothing but household chores all weekend. It's been great and I bloody hate housework. I have had two very brief interludes;

Yesterday I had to vote (how democratic is it really when you get fined $250 for not voting?) Kevin Rudd and Labour got in. I mean what kind of a name is Kevin for a Prime Minister. PM’s should have distinguished like George, John or Margaret, they shouldn’t have names from a Croydon council estate, it’s almost as bad as Tony! Anyway…

Today I met T. for a drink and a spot of people watching at The Colombian on Oxford Street. God that place is so gay, it’s FABULOUS! On the way I brought myself an amazing new pair of summer shoes.

Newsround

Ohh… please get over yourself! You have had a dubious taste of fame due to your son being jailed for training with terrorists in Afghanistan and now you just want to keep you face in the lime light.
Do you really think we care about your opinion on national politics?

Having moved to the city…I read this story with interest. This murderous caravan park is just down the road from what used to be my local shopping centre.

And finally for today some news from the world of music, Van Halen are back and touring with front man David Lee Roth.

God I'm bored today!

Mother

Thanks to Google Analytics I know when you read my blog. Twice in the last month!

All I have to say is this;
If you don’t read my writing how can I expect anyone else too?

Billy Elliott

On his last night in Sydney I took Todd to see Billy Elliott the Musical. I saw the movie ages ago and have seen it many times since its release in 2000. It makes me cry every time I see it.

So I booked tickets. I booked ticked for the opening night as a gift for Todd’s birthday. When the tickets arrived, they weren’t for opening night and amazingly enough just so happened to be for the last night he was in town. Phew!

After a last supper of sushi and a couple of glasses of wine we made our way to the Capitol Theatre just in time for the last call of take your seats. We were in the dress circle, slightly to the left of the stage. Not bad seats. It was sold out.

The show started with a Pathe newsreel showing the mining industry in the 30’s during the ‘good’ times. The singing started early with the whole cast coming onto stage in 80s garb singing about keeping the community together and deciding to strike.

The sets were amazing. There was the generic room set that slid in from left and right, the ‘Elliott’ house set that spiralled up from a hole in the stage with a bed on top of a set of stairs with a little kitchen at the bottom. The toilet block at the gym pulled out of the side of the room set. All very clever and beautifully put together.

The stage version ran along the same lines at the movie and included a few of the more memorable lines, such as;

Mrs. Wilkinson: This'll sound strange, Billy, but for some time now I've been thinkin' of the Royal Ballet School.
Billy: Aren't you a bit old, miss?

And

Debbie : don’t you fancy us, Billy?
Billy : Nah!
Debbie : I’ll show us me fanny.
Billy : Nah, you’re alright.

The musical was directed by the same guy who directed the movie Stephen Daldry, the lyrics by Lee Hall (he wrote the script for the movie) and the music was written Elton John. It was surprising that none of the songs had a hook, but then they are used to writing spoken word, not sung. Neither Todd nor I left humming, thinking we’d have that tune stuck in our head for a while. Shame really because from what I can remember the songs were pretty good.

The dancing however was completely memorable. I was concerned about the thought of watching a precocious little bugger on the stage for several hours, but I was completely entranced. I’m not sure which of the four Billy’s was playing on Tuesday night, but he was amazing. There was a scene (the bit in the movie where his Dad finds him dancing in the gym with Michael) where he was dancing Swan Lake with his older self. There was dry ice, wire work and ballet. It made me cry. I forgot how much I like ballet. The kid and the guy floated around the stage for maybe four or five minutes, it was beautiful.

Anyway, despite the un-catchiness of the songs I would say go see it, the dancing is amazing, but watch the movie first.

PS. Todd has arrived In Washington ;-)

He's Leaving on A Jetplane

Todd’s gone, I took him to the airport with the assistance of A and Sue-Ellen. We sent him through the customs gate with a sign that said ‘Shirley you’re not leaving!’

His flight is at 3.15pm and he’ll be sitting in his nice Business class seat after being upgraded.

As requested there was no scene at the airport. Well, maybe a minor one from Sue-Ellen.

- One of the many pictures I took during our faux Grauation photoshoot yesterday at Sydney Uni

He's Leaving - Not Yet

This time tomorrow Todd will have walked through the point of no return at the airport in time for his 3.15pm flight to the Los Angeles.

What am I going to do with myself?

- 1 Get a full nights sleep without a 1am phone call telling me he can’t sleep.
- 2 Get an early night or two
- 3 Redefine the meaning of cheap dinner from $60 to $10
- 4 Reduce my alcohol intake and give my liver a rest
- 5 Stop carrying chewing gum in my handbag
- 6 Talk to Puss about books and writing
- 7 Have to find someone else who appreciates the fine dining experience
- 8 Miss him terribly!

But I still have him for one more night, so no moppin’ about and feeling sorry for myself. I’ll deal with the fall out, when it happens.

That Time of Year Approaches

ANTM Cycle 9 starts on Fox 8 on 4th December. Ohhhh... ;-)

Meat on A Stick

I had a really long sleep. Puss finally got me moving on Sunday morning with a paw in the face and a meow. He was wasting away clearly. I sat up and swung my legs over the edge of the bed and stopped dead. My legs hurt, my arms and shoulders ached and my boobs felt like they’d been thumped. I hurt all over. That god damn boat trip!

As I walked past the mirror I caught sight of my legs. The gentlemen amongst you please help me by telling me how attractive purple legs are? I suppose i be thankful that I heal quickly. I spent the day on the sofa with Puss, watching telly from the week (House, NCIS and Life on Mars) before getting in the shower and getting ready to go to dinner.

Todd had booked Wildfire for Rachel, him and I. I’d never been before and believing it to be posh I put on a skirt. It was fairly posh…an amazing fit-out with unique lights and private rooms above. We had a nice spot looking out over the Opera House. But I got the feeling it was more about the tourist than the local. We were one of the few tables that seemed to have made an effort when getting ready and many looked they had just pooped in after a day of the tourist trail. The prices kept out the true riffraff.

The food was amazing, as was the wine and the desserts. It was another evening of chatting and we all came to the conclusion that not enough people experience fine dining as a form of entertainment. To most people eating is something you have to do to survive, so it is not something that should be the only thing you do all night. We arrived at six and left just before ten. It was a beautiful evening.

I got the bus home, Todd and Rachel went for final coffee.

(photos to come)

Harbour Cruise - My Bruised Arse

Saturday morning saw me making melba toasts (cut up bread, place on baking sheet in 200O oven until crisp) for Todd’s harbour cruise while I waited for the real estate guy to come round and do a house inspection. Far too much to deal with a Saturday morning if you want my opinion!

Around noon I left the house with my new red shopping trolley loaded with pate, melba toasts, wine, ice and my camera. I was going to get the bus, but after waiting twenty minutes I jumped in a cab. Once again the taxi won the Taxi V Bus race. I met Todd and some friends at King Street Wharf and we waited for the boat.

Now please bear in mind I was expecting something big and stable to CRUISE around the harbour in. You can imagine my surprise when a sail boat slipped into the pick up position. We all climbed aboard, and settled in as we motored out into the harbour under the bridge. It was actually very relaxing and I took heaps of photos to remember the day, Todd eating nibbles, drinking wine and generally being the hostess with the mostest.

We (there were 11 of us on the boat and the skipper) drank, laughed and chatted. Some of us reminisced about the bad habits we had picked up from Todd and some just listened and thanked their lucky stars they hadn’t known him long enough to pick them up. We stopped and put down the anchor and a few went for a swim. I was happy on board taking pictures.

Once the swimming was over the skipper suggested we go for a little sail. He informed us that because it was a little windy we would only use the little sail at the front. The anchor was pulled up, the sail was unwrapped. It flapped about for a bit then it caught. We took off like a bullet from a gun and the boat tipped. From 0 -15knots (17mph/27kph) like a racing car.

I slipped of my perch, thinking first and for most about the camera I flipped my right arm over the edge of the galley as my legs vanished over the edge of the boat and into the water. My left hand grabbed onto anything (turned out to be a rope winder), my legs bounced about on the edge of the boat as I pulled myself up and finally got a foothold on the little wooden plinth on the side. I wasn’t near anyone, so I didn’t have help like a couple of others that also experienced the pleasures of sailing. I’m told it only took a few minutes to right us again, but it felt like an hour. I was soaked. The only dry thing about me was my camera hand.


The rest of the ‘cruise’ I hardly moved. As the saying goes ‘It’s all good fun until someone get hurt, then it’s bloody hilarious’ I was the butt of jokes. But weirdly enough I didn’t care. If we tipped again I was secure and oddly I was having fun. The adrenaline had kicked in and I was what can only be described as high.

I was however, really glad to be back on dry land when it was over. If it hadn’t of been over dramatic I would have kissed the ground. I went home to shower before our dinner to find a few purple masses gathering under the skin on my legs and arms.

Dinner at IThai on King Street Wharf was lovely, more reminiscing, good food and wine and an early night for all. After the drama of the boat I think everyone was completely knackered.

Dancing with Muscles

I went to Hellfire on Friday with Todd. The last Hellfire he’ll ever go to. In less than a week he’ll be gone. Anyway…I was kitted out in the standard outfit, bra, corset, PVC skirt and thigh high boots. Todd had on his leather trousers and a white Everlast singlet. We met and then went to dinner at Bettys Soup Kitchen. I love Oxford Street, no one batted an eyelid.

We ate a simple dinner of mash, sausages and beef stroganoff before moving onto the main entertainment of the evening. We walked the short distance with much appreciative attention. At the door Todd was told he had to take his shirt off. No white allowed, you see.

Drinks were purchased, seats were taken, and the people watching commenced. There was the tourist friends (two guys in all black and wide eyed), the regulars, the single guy waiting for his date dressed in a Centurion outfit and the first-timers.

You can always tell the first timers. They look too hard at others and dress in simple black. The main example of a first timer for the evening was the guy we nicknamed ‘Dancing with Muscles’, he was wearing black trousers and a black singlet. He had short close cropped hair and may have had a close relationship with ‘roids. We watched him on the dance floor for quite sometime, flexing his pecs, tightening his biceps, the exposing of his six pack…it was hilarious but intriguing at the same time. And we were the only ones watching.

A couple of months ago Manacle closed its doors. Manacle was the Leather Pride bar for Sydney gay population. They’ve all moved to Hellfire. I have never seen so many leather harnesses. This is a good thing if you’re a boy into boys, but not so good if you’re a girl in boys. The eye candy factor was amazing and I shall continue going if only to get inspiration for my next semester at uni.